All The Feels: 3 Keys For Managing Emotions During Family Gatherings

The holidays can stir up all sorts of emotions both good and bad, and since most of us will be retreating back to our childhood homes to be with family, it is easy to get lost in their visions of us as our ten-year-old selves rather than the fully grown and independent person we've worked hard to become (and all the quirks, personality and opinions that come with it). Despite the want to be close with family and share some quality time, emotions can run high and we may find ourselves a little too close for comfort. Katie Horwich of  WANT (Women Against Negative Talk), provides some insight and helpful tips to staying sane, stress-free and curb the negativity, by being your true self this season.  The holiday season. On one hand, it’s a time of food, fun and family togetherness. On the other hand… it’s a time of food, fun and family togetherness. Getting together with the family can bring out all sorts of emotions. No matter how close your clan is or how different you all are, the various personalities at play coupled with the high-energy of the holiday season too often means we end up associating this time of year with stress, obligation and forced oversharing. Everyone somehow gets entangled in everyone else’s business, and come mid-December we’re counting down the days until the parties end and the New Year strikes. What a waste of holiday cheer! Setting mindful boundaries with our loved ones right now is crucial to not only our sanity, but to our relationships with our relatives. For most of us, we’re only with our extended family a few times throughout the year, so it’s important that when we are all together, it’s helping to build the kinds of relationships – and, so cliché, but memories – we want to have. It can be so easy to get into a scuffle when there are lots of different personalities in the room, but it’s easily avoidable if you’re coming from the right place. Make sure the underlying emotion you carry with you is love. Be empathetic. Be assertive. Listen to your heart for cues on when to budge and when to stand firm. When to speak up and when to let it go. Just because you’re with your family doesn’t mean you need to morph into a different version of yourself. The more you do this, the more they’ll catch on. The more they catch on, the more comfortable they’ll feel doing the same. And that’s the best holiday present you could give them. Here are three ways to keep things civil, compassionate and in control without resorting to anger or walls.

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